5 Ways to Reignite the Flame


reignite flameChange is the only constant in life. Whether you are three months old or 30, people change. Interests change. Thoughts change. Relationships change. It’s the daily events that can cause a person to change their perspective on a situation.

Sometimes perspective adapts for the person to see exactly what they want. Maybe the dust has settled, and a person finally sees what they desperately hoped they’d never see. Things happen in the blink of an eye. Before you realize it, you can go from being the life of the party to the party-pooper, rushing home to relieve the babysitter. It can go from pure romance to no chance.

However, it happens; many things cause situations to change. To survive, we need to keep up with the ever-changing times.

Sometimes the hustle and bustle of busy everyday life can cause a relationship to grow stagnant, and the once bright flame might grow dull. Especially after children, it is important to keep your connection strong. Here are five ideas to reignite the flame.

1. Remember why you chose him.

Maybe you chose him because he was your other half. Or perhaps he was the only one that could make you laugh. Maybe he was the only one that could drive you crazy. Either way, you put it, he is your choice. This is your circus. He is your monkey. Don’t forget. 

2. Take time for yourself.

It is true what they say; you can never love anyone if you don’t love yourself. It is important to love yourself first, even if that sounds selfish. Take an hour to get your hair done. Give yourself a manicure. However, if you want to make sure you take some time to pamper yourself, make sure you do it. No one will love you the way you do. So take some time to treasure you!

3. Take time for just the two of you.

Date night is important to maintain that connection. You will never stop learning about each other, and what better way than to go on a date. Keeping the romance alive is imperative to maintaining a healthy relationship. Drop the kids off at Grandma’s and go to your favorite restaurant. Put the kids to bed and play a game. There are many things the two of you can do for fun at home or out on the town. Whatever you do, make sure to have fun. 

4. Get creative.

Trying new things can be scary. Whether in the bedroom or a restaurant, it’s hard to break out of your comfort zone. Order something different than you usually get. Skip the fried rice you know and love, and get the sashimi. It may seem daunting, but you might like it. Get some new lingerie and strut your stuff! Embracing that risk leads to growth for both you and your partner. 

5. Communicate.

Communication is key, above all else. You might perceive things differently from your partner, and that’s okay if you talk about it. Keeping that line of communication open will clear up any misunderstanding on either end. Allowing those pathways to be open, both receptive and expressive, gives both sides the chance to feel heard, appreciated, and accepted regardless of who is right or wrong. Without communication, there is no trust. With no trust, there is no relationship. 

What are some ways you and your partner reignite the flame?

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A Westchester native, Rachel is a lover of all things DIY, food, and Harry Potter. After graduating from Mercy College with a Masters in Education, she moved to Orlando in 2012 to teach, only to find there is no place like home. Rachel is the wife to one amazing Chef, Lucas, mommy to 2 beautiful baby girls, Lana and Harper, and a very handsome fur baby, Levi. Rachel is excited to raise her kids where she grew up and continue the traditions she was raised with, especially going to Yankee games in the summer. When she is not juggling family and teaching, you can find her exploring all Westchester has to offer.


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