As a parent, you like to enrich your child’s life as much as possible. Aside from education, we like to include activities where our children can “let loose” and have some fun. Less structure, so to speak. These activities range from music lessons, sporting activities, dance classes, art classes – the possibilities are endless.
As much as we may gripe and complain about how many places we have to schlepp our kids to, we do it because it makes the kiddies happy to go to these activities. But what about when the kids stop wanting to go to the activities?
My daughter went to dance class for six years. Every Saturday, we would get dressed and go to dance class. I placed her in dance at a very young age as a way to interact with children her age, since she was not enrolled in daycare. I wanted to ensure she had a place to interact with children similarly aged.
Each week, class was a place for her to interact with other children, and to learn instruction from an instructor. In addition, each class was preparation for the dance recital which occurred at the end of the dance school year, in June. My daughter took Tap, Ballet, Hip Hop and Jazz. As she aged, I noticed that her enthusiasm was not as great as some of the other kids in class. I chocked it up to her personality, as she is not quite as animated as other children. She is very calm and laid back in nature, much like myself.
Towards the end of this past dance school year I had an epiphany. Although I knew she enjoyed going to dance class on Saturdays, and I know she loved the teachers and seeing her classmates, I felt like maybe she didn’t LOVE dance class. So, I made the executive decision to not enroll her in dance class come September.
As summer rolled along, I began getting antsy. I was thinking. “Am I making the right decision?” “Will she be upset with me if I don’t enroll her?” “What if she demands to go to dance class after the enrollment period ends? Then I will have to scramble to find another dance studio.” “What if I am making the wrong decision?” The thoughts that we come up with when making decisions for our kids……
September came along, and I stayed firm with my decision (as if I had announced all over on my social media for all to see and judge *chuckle chuckle chuckle*). The enrollment period came and went. My daughter did not ask me about dance class ONCE. Our Saturday ritual changed. My younger son was able to play soccer in the local town league, and we went to cheer on little brother every Saturday. No feathers were ruffled. No tantrums were had. No emotional breakdowns occurred.
Sometimes we read too closely into what society or communities deem acceptable/appropriate for our kids. I implore you to always be mindful of what YOUR child wants. Sometimes we “make” our kids continue activities well after the excitement has expired for our children. Should I have stopped dance class earlier than I did? Who knows? But I am glad that I didn’t fall into the trap of “she is supposed to continue dance until she graduates elementary/middle school/high school without re-assessing whether or not she wanted to do so. Some children find their passion in their extra-curricular activity and that is fantastic. But don’t discount those children who may “go with the flow” because “it’s something that we’ve always done.”
I invite you to share your thoughts with me on this subject – I found it very interesting and enlightening.
