And they all looked at us and said, as if we didn’t raise two AMAZING kids, “You know, a puppy is a lot of work. It’s just like having a baby.” Two months in and fully seasoned, I can tell you that a puppy is NOTHING like a baby.
1. You can lock your puppy in a cage.
I mean CRATE! That wire thing that’s just big enough to fit the dog. You’re supposed to lock your puppy up in that thing for hours at a time, most of the day, in fact, as well as all night long. He’ll just happily sit there and chew on his toys or sleep the whole time! He likes it!
2. A puppy sleeps through the night.
My younger daughter and I read so many books before our puppy came. We talked to friends. We searched online. We timed the puppy arrival in the summer because everyone knows you have to get up every two hours during the night to potty train your puppy. Well, our wonderful trainer tipped us off that we could put the puppy in the cage at 11:00 p.m., go upstairs, and come down in the morning, and he would be fine. And he was! He cried for two nights, and on the third night, he stopped.
3. You don’t have to wash your puppy every day.
4. You don’t have to do laundry every day!
5. A puppy doesn’t require much in the way of stuff.
6. A puppy won’t bite your nipples.
But here’s where a puppy is exactly like a baby. A puppy will capture your heart and then eat something they are not supposed to, like a chocolate bar, or a deadly-for-dogs raisin, or a sharp shrapnel of bone, or a seashell, and your maternal instincts will kick in. You’ll have to rush your puppy to the vet and calm his nervous little shaking body, all the while feeling guilty that you looked away and allowed your puppy to get hurt.
He’ll sit quietly in your lap for the first time, looking up at you with his puppy dog eyes, saying mommy, tell me it’s going to be ok.
And you will drop everything else and sit there with him until he’s ok, you’ll bring him home and give him ice cream and sit by him at night until he falls asleep, and you’ll check on him at 2 a.m., and you’ll give him a special piece of chicken in the morning because he’s your little guy.